Searching For Perfection
by krazykook
Summary: Sequel to 'Working For Perfection.' All was well, until something happens which makes Ginny relapse and restart her mission for 'Perfection.' WARNING: Contains eating disorders.
1. Chapter 1

**I'M BACK!!!!  
AND THIS IS THE SEQUEL TO 'WORKING FOR PERFECTION'**

**If you have not read that story, please do before you read this one. It will make more sense!  
**

**It may not be very long, but it is sad. Im sorry, Don't hate me!!!!!**

**I DO NOT OWN HP!!!!!**

**ENJOY!!!!**

Life is something that you should never take for granted. It could be taken away from you in an instant. Death doesn't care who it targets, all Death knows is that everybody, at some point, will be on his list and there's no way of escaping from it.

Ginny's fifth year was approaching, and the usual stress of exams, leaving her parents and homework was taking its toll on the young girl. She knew what to expect, after receiving an hour long speech from Hermione on how much work she was expected to do and how many hours she needed to study each week, but she only thought she was over exaggerating.

On top of all that, the news that Lord Voldemort had returned had left everybody in a constant state of worry. More and more meetings for The Order were being held each week, as more news of Muggles and Muggle born families disappearing were being plastered across The Daily Prophet.

However what worried her most was that she and Harry were becoming more distant. Obviously, it would be harder for Harry to deal with recent the up raise of the 'Dark Lord', but they were hardly speaking anymore. Whenever she did try to speak to him, he would either already in be in a hushed conversation with Ron and Hermione, or in such a foul mood you couldn't step within ten feet of him without being snapped at.

"_I know he is planning something with Ron and Hermione, but why can't he talk to me as well? After all, I am his girlfriend. I'm just fed up of being ignored, it's like I no longer exist in his world anymore." _She thought glumly, whilst pushing her food around on her plate.

Ginny was recovering well from her anorexia and bulimia, but was finding it difficult. Occasionally, something would happen which would make her want to relapse, but Harry would always pull her through and support her all the way.

However, the past few weeks, everybody was so busy about something or another, Ginny's insecurities just kept building on top of each other. She knew that it wasn't healthy thinking that way, but she couldn't help it. Even though she had reached and sustained a healthy weight, and was finally learning to accept that she was beautiful the way she was, she still had a long way to go.

Due to the recent happenings, her appetite had decreased and she had lost a little bit of weight,

"_Thankfully it's not that noticeable, the last thing I want is for people to worry about me again. I want that stage in my life to be in the past."_

"Ginny dear, hurry up and finish your dinner, the Order are having another meeting tonight so you'll need to go into your room." Mrs. Weasley told her kindly, at the same time she was magically washing everybody else's dishes.

"Sure." Stuffing one last forkful of chicken into her mouth, Ginny stood up and gave her Mum the rest of her unfinished meal.

"Is that all your having, are you sure you don't want anymore?" Questioned Mrs. Weasley.

"No, I'm fine. I think I'll just go to sleep early tonight, I'm really tired" Ginny stated, kissing her Mum gently on the cheek, before turning around and heading towards the stairs.

Once outside her door, she heard a quiet cough before a small voice spoke.

"Ginny, Erm can I speak to you for a minute?" It was Harry.

"What's wrong?" Ginny asked slightly panicked at the tone of Harry's voice. Something wasn't right.

Ginny indicated for Harry to follow her into her room, and closed the door once he had entered. His shoulders were slouched and it looked like he hadn't had any sleep in awhile. All Ginny wanted to do was to hug him and tell him everything will be ok, like he had done to her many times before.

"Ginny, listen…" He started.

"_This isn't good. Anything that starts with those words can never be a good thing."_

"I can't be involved with you anymore. We've got to stop seeing each other. We can't be together." He said quietly.

Ginny couldn't speak, move nor breathe. Shock had left her immobilised.

"_No, this can't be happening, not now." _She pleaded mentally.

"Voldemort is using people that his enemies are close to. He's already used you as bait once, and that was just because you're my best friend's sister. Think how much danger you'll be in if we keep this up. He'll know, he'll find out. He'll try and get to me through you."

Her heart felt like it had been ripped out of her chest and had a stake stabbed through it. Multiple times. Staring into his bright emerald eyes, she felt the warm tears slowly begin to form behind her own. Determined not to let them fall, she looked up at the ceiling.

"I understand." She lied, if she was going to be honest she would have told him that he was being ridiculous and that they had to stay and fight together during these hard times. But she didn't ant to hurt his feelings.

"I don't want this to happen Gin, honestly I don't. It's just that I don't want to see you hurt."

"_You're hurting me by doing this." _She wanted to say, but the words wouldn't leave her mouth.

"I'm sorry." He whispered.

With that, Harry slowly walked out of the door, closing it behind him. Ginny was stuck to the spot, still unable to breathe, her vision became blurry and she began to sway slightly.

"_This is just a nightmare, it can't be true. I won't believe it; Harry would never hurt me like that."_

However, as time went on, realisation slowly began to hit home and she fell on her knees, tears now pouring out of her eyes.

"_It's all my fault."_

**What have i done?!?!?!?!**

**Im evil i know....  
You may have recognised part of Harry's speech...Did you?!?!?...Tell the truth.  
Then i will know the true die hard HP fans!**

**So what did you think?!?**

**Ive got a number in my head, and that is the number of reviews i am hoping for!  
i WILL be upset if i dont get that many...=P**

**Please note that i do enjoy reading every single review, but simply do not have the time to reply to all.  
However if i do not reply, i will hopefully mention you in the next chapter!**

**Krazykook**

**=)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2.  
This chapter has acually been written for a few days, but Fanfiction would not let me upload it?!?!  
****At first i was like...NOOO this cannot be happening! But its working now, so theres my excuse. =)**

**Anyways...on with the disclaimer I DO NOT OWN HP!!!**

**Enjoy!**

**P.s. thanks to everyone who reviewed! Kitty Kelsey, TwilighterRose, MyNameInsertedHere, honeyduck, Lov3good, lola potter, ambz08 and funsizedpixie22. This chapter is for you....**

Darkness.

Nothing but darkness surrounded Ginny now. The darkness consumed all around her, blocking all of her senses and left her feeling numb. Nothing made sense any more; all her thoughts were clouded and irrational. She wanted to wake up from this awful nightmare, snap out of this torture and realise none of this had ever happened; but she couldn't. The only person that could save her now was the same person that caused her to feel like this. Harry.

What had she done wrong? Had she hurt him in anyway, without realising so?

She wanted answers. She wanted to march straight to his room and scream at him until she got the answers she deserved. She wanted to know the truth, and not some fabricated lie. But she couldn't. She was physically unable to do anything apart from lay on the cold, hard floorboards of her room. She couldn't even cry, it seemed as though she had ran out of tears after the first two hours after _it_ happened.

"_I can't be involved with you anymore. We've got to stop seeing each other. We can't be together_."Her face twisted in agony as she remembered the exact words Harry had used.

"_We can't be together."_ The words kept repeating in her mind, like a stuck record. Every time she heard them, the more real it became for her.

"_Why would Harry do this to me? I truly thought that he cared about me, wanted me to be happy. Maybe he lying to me all the time, made me believe he cared about me, but actually felt the complete opposite. Maybe he only went along with it because he felt sorry for me, felt sorry for the girl who nobody cared about. Felt sorry for the girl who didn't deserve to be loved or to have any friends. Felt sorry for the girl that was worthless and could do nothing right."_

"_Maybe he couldn't take anymore of my selfishness, my constant complaining. I should have listened to what he wanted, and not just what I wanted. None of this was Harry's fault, it was all mine. I should be the one to blame for everything going wrong, not Harry. Harry has a hard enough time with all that's going on, harder than anybody else; he hasn't got time for a weak, little girl like myself."_ Finally able to compose herself enough, she carefully pushed herself into a sitting position.

"Ginny what are you doing on the floor?" Ron asked confused at his younger sister's current choice of positioning. "Come on; get up, mum wants to speak to us all." With that he walked back out of the door, muttering, "Weird girl." As he went.

"_I know."_ She thought to herself.

Ginny didn't reply, instead she silently stood up and followed Ron towards the dinning room where every body else was sat. To be honest, she couldn't really care less about what her mum had to tell her, it was most likely something to do with how everybody has to help with cleaning the house. Mundane things like that didn't bother her anymore; she had more important, and frankly more hurtful, things to worry about now.

Taking a seat in her usual spot, Ginny noticed something was different. Harry was not sat next to her like he normally was. Instead he was sat across the table next to Ron and Hermione, and refused to make eye contact with her, refused to even acknowledge that she had entered the room actually. It hurt her to even think that her theory, that he didn't care, was right. It made her want to disappear into the floor and never be seen again.

"_That would work actually. Everybody would be happy, I would be gone. They wouldn't have to constantly watch me. They try to hide the fact that they are doing it, but I'm not stupid, I can see glancing at me during meal times when they think I'm not watching. They don't trust me, and why should they trust me? I didn't do anything to earn their trust."_

Right then Mrs. Weasley began to speak. Her voice had an anxious edge to it, which made everybody, apart from Ginny, tense and sit up straighter.

"I know you're all wondering why I have called you here." Nobody dared to interrupt her. "And we all understand that lately you have been kept in the dark about the recent meetings, which must be infuriating, especially for you, Harry dear." At that everybody nodded, and a low, incomprehensible grumble came from the twins.

"But as you know," Mrs. Weasley continued, "The world had become a more dangerous place for everyone now since…well…you know who has returned. This means that every member of the Order has to take up extra shifts. Me, your father and Remus will have to work a lot more in the future, sometimes being gone for a few days at a tine. But don't worry you will never be left on your own, one of us will always be here." She glanced at Ginny while saying the last sentence.

Everybody stayed silent, not sure of how to respond to the news. Things were gradually getting worse in both the muggle and magical community, more and more lives were being lost and an increasing number of families were being torn apart.

Eventually, Mrs. Weasley retreated into the kitchen to serve dinner. Ginny really didn't want to eat now, she felt sick to the stomache, but knew because of what happened earlier in her life she would have to eat something to please those around her.

Forking the food in front of her, Ginny had no appetite what so ever, all she wanted to do was crawl up into a ball underneath her quilt. **(A/N I don't know what you call it in America, but in England, a quilt is basically the blanket/covers you have on your bed.)** Reluctantly, she put a carrot in her mouth and began to chew slowly.

The table was quiet during dinner, occasionally someone would make a comment, but nobody really took any notice. Ginny only ate a little bit more, but her stomache was already churning uncomfortably. Excusing herself from the table, she quickly ran up the stairs and straight into the bathroom she still shares with Hermione. Leaning over the toilet, Ginny stuck two fingers down her throat until all the food she had just eaten had been purged.

"_What am I doing? I shouldn't be doing this!" _She mentally screamed at herself, but her body didn't seem to listen. Standing up from her now seated position on the floor beside the toilet, Ginny ran to her bed and hid beneath the covers. She was ashamed at what she had just done; she hadn't done that in over a year and planned to never do it ever again. Tears escaping from her eyes, Ginny cried herself to sleep that night, her last thought being,

"_Why?"_

**Did you like it?**

**I know what your thinking... How could you do that to Ginny, you're EVIL!!!!  
But anyways, tell me what you think and if any of you have any ideas, i would love to know!**

**REVIEW!**

**Krazykook.**

**=)**


	3. Chapter 3

**IM SORRY FOR THE LONG WAIT!!!!  
please don't throw vegetables at me!!  
well heres my excuse, i had to study for a A level Physics, Chemisty and Biology exam...  
yeah, not nice.  
anyways, if i fail them and get kicked off the course... I BLAME YOU!!!!  
**

**Sorry it's not very long either...  
oh and by the way...was Fanfiction faulty, because i didn't seem to get as many reviews last chapter...  
i hope you all still love me... =)  
Enough with the rambling...  
**

**DISCLAIMER. I DON NOT OWN HP!**

**ENJOY!**

_Running through a deep forest, Ginny could feel the wind whip her fiery red hair into her face and the cold sting on her bare arms. Every now and then, branches would catch her as she ran faster and faster, deeper into the forest. All around her was silent, apart from the familiar voice calling out her name from the distance. She did not know who this voice belonged to, but she had heard it many times before, why else would she be running towards it?_

"_Ginny!" The voice shouted once again, making Ginny speed up._

"_Where are you?" Her eyes frantically searched for the being the voice belonged to._

"_Hurry Ginny! Ginny!" The voice was getting close now._

_Sweat lacing her fore head, Ginny continued to run. Not caring where she was, or heading to, all she knew was that she wanted to get to the voice. Nothing would or could stop her. Even when her foot got caught on a tree root and was sent flying towards the ground, she stood up, albeit breathless, and carried on her personal mission._

_Where had she heard that voice before? Why was it so familiar? Why did she feel as if she could trust this voice? All these questions plagued her mind, as she ran, searching for the voice that called for her._

_Then, out of the darkness, he appeared. Slowing down to a walk, Ginny approached the figure, which she now realised was Harry. Whilst reaching out her hand to place on his shoulder, Harry turned round and stared into her eyes. Without saying a word, he walked straight past her and into the darkness once again._

_Ginny was left all alone._

"_Harry? Where are you going? Harry, come back! Don't leave me, please don't leave me Harry. I love you." She cried, falling to her knees._

Ginny awoke to ear piercing screams. Once she had realised that it was in fact her that was screaming, it was too late, everybody in the house had gathered around her bed.

"_Merlin! They're all going to think that I'm crazy; you don't just wake up screaming for no apparent reason. I could just say it was about Voldemort. I suppose it could work with all that's going on."_

Breathing heavily, Ginny brought a shaky hand up to her face and rubbed it gently. All eyes were on her, and she was completely aware of that fact. She hated the attention; all she wished for was that she would all just let her be. That is apart from Harry, from which she wanted all the attention she could gather.

"Ginny dear, what's wrong?" Her panicked mother asked cautiously.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Her father spoke up for the first time.

Did she really want to talk about what she had just dreamt? Of course not! She knew she could talk to her family and friends about anything, especially her mother and Hermione, but this was something that she had to keep to herself.

"_I will just have to deal with it myself; no point in troubling anybody else with my problems."_

Slowly shaking her head from side to side, a teary eyed Ginny excused herself and made her way to the bathroom she shared with Hermione to get ready for the day. Once in there, Ginny looked at herself in mirror and noticed the dark circles that now resided permanently under her eyes and that the whites of her eyes were now tinged with a reddish colour, showing the world that she had recently been crying.

Without really realising what she was doing, Ginny grabbed at her stomache and sighed.

"_I'll never be able to get rid of you will I?"_

"_You could if you really wanted to, you've done it before, it will be easy."_

"_Stop it Ginny."_

"_Maybe that's the real reason why Harry left you. You were getting to fat for him again." _The voice inside her head sneered at her.

"_No, Harry wouldn't do that. He said it was too dangerous for us to be together, he didn't want to risk me getting hurt."_

"_Why are you still defending him? He's the one that left you. You obviously weren't good enough for him."_

Quickly walking out of the bathroom, in the futile attempt to rid the voice in her head, Ginny went in search for Hermione. She hadn't properly spoken to her since on the train back from Hogwarts, and she had missed someone being there for her, listening to what she had to say. But once she had entered the room, she found that Hermione wasn't there.

"_She must be in Harry and Ron's room. I'll go and get her; I suppose it's quite important." _She reasoned with herself.

Climbing the extra level of stairs to reach Harry and Ron's room, Ginny knocked on the wooden door and entered with being given permission. What she found shocked her. All three of them, Harry, Ron and Hermione, all huddled together in the middle of the room, all wearing coats. Hermione was even carrying a shoulder bag.

"Where are you going?" Ginny asked quietly.

At hearing her voice, the Golden Trio turning around, all with shocked expression on their faces.

**What have i done?!?!?!?!?  
oh my wordy word!**

**Tell me what you think with that little button down below!  
it really does my little day- sometimes i even let out a little squeek of joy...  
REVIEW!!! REVIEW!!! REVIEW!!!**

**KrazyKook.**

**=)**


	4. Chapter 4

**I AM SO, SO SORRY!!!  
I don't blame you if you hate me, i would!  
My life has just been hectic, with school and exam's and all that jazz...**

**DISCALIMER I DO NOT OWN HP!!!**

**WARNING: This chapter contains some sensitve material, so if it encourages you to do anything, DON'T!!! **

**ENJOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

**CHAPTER 4.**

_Climbing the extra level of stairs to reach Harry and Ron's room, Ginny knocked on the wooden door and entered with being given permission. What she found shocked her. All three of them, Harry, Ron and Hermione, all huddled together in the middle of the room, all wearing coats. Hermione was even carrying a shoulder bag._

"_Where are you going?" Ginny asked quietly._

_At hearing her voice, the Golden Trio turning around, all with shocked expression on their faces._

* * *

"Ginny, what are you doing in here?" Ron asked shortly.

"You didn't answer my question, where are you going?"

Nobody answered; instead they all turned their heads to the floor.

"ANSWER ME! WHERE ARE YOU GOING?" Storming over to the group, Ginny stood directly in front of Ron, her face becoming redder the more time that went on.

"Gin, don't shout. The other's will hear you." Harry hissed.

Turning her glare on the boy that she loved, Ginny replied,

"Then tell me where you're going."

* * *

"_Why is this happening to me? What have I done to deserve this life?" _Curled up in a ball on her bathroom floor, tears streamed out of Ginny's eyes and down her cheeks.

"_Why does everything good in my life leave me or die? Do I not deserve a normal, happy life? What is the point in even trying any more? Maybe every bodies lives would be better without poor, little Ginny Weasley."_

Without realising what she was doing, Ginny slowly pushed herself off of the floor and onto her feet. To anybody watching her, she would appear to be in a trance or under a spell of some sort. Her eyes were empty of all life, her face blank of all emotions and she moved as if there was some other being controlling her. It appeared that the real Ginny had gone.

* * *

_FLASHBACK…_

"_We have to leave Ginny, We can't tell you why, but we have to." Harry spoke softly._

"_Why can't you tell me, I promise I won't tell anyone." _

"_Ginny, it's not that we don't want to, we can't. Please Gin, You've got to understand." Hermione tried to reason._

"_I can't understand if you won't tell me!" Frustrated, Ginny balled up her fists. "Take me with you, I can help you with whatever you're doing."_

"_It's too dangerous Gin…"_

"_Don't give me that 'too dangerous' crap Ron, I'm stronger than you think!" Snapped Ginny._

_Taking a few deep breathes, in an attempt to calm her down, Ginny looked at her hands._

"_When are you going?"_

_Silence. Nobody answered._

"_When are you going?" Ginny asked, louder then before._

"_Tonight." It was so quietly whispered Ginny almost missed it, and didn't know who actually said it._

"_WHAT?!" She screamed in response._

"No, they can't leave. They can't leave me!" _Ginny thought to herself._

"_NO! You are not going, I'm not going to let you! You can't leave now, not with the way things are!"_

"_Why do you think we are going Ginny? Were not exactly going on a holiday." Ron replied sarcastically._

_A single tear escaped her eye, furiously wiping it away, Ginny whispered,_

"_I suppose this is it then. Goodbye, it was nice knowing you." Before turning around and running out of the door. In the background, she thought she heard someone cry her name, but it didn't matter any more. Nothing mattered any more._

_END FLASHBACK…_

* * *

Standing in front of the bathroom mirror, Ginny stared at her reflection. It physically hurt her to think about _Him _now, it felt as if part of her heart was trying to escape from her body.

Her face scrunched up in pain, and her body collapsed from underneath her, once that particular memory had ended. Cradling her body, Ginny looked down in to the palm of her hand and found the blade that she had unconsciously retrieved from the cupboard.

"_Would anybody actually really care if I died? Maybe they would be sad for about a week or two, but eventually they would get over it and completely forget about me. I'd be the distant memory that you can't quite remember from the back of your mind."_

Slowly raising the blade to her wrist, carefully twisting it between her thumb and index finger, she grazed the edge of the blade against her skin, as if practising and imagining about what she was about to do.

Breathing heavily, she pressed the blade harder against her skin and felt the blood trickle down into her hand and onto the floor. With a smile gracing her mouth, she made another cut and again watched the blood escape from her body.

Ginny felt relieved, as if all of her problems had been taken away for just that moment when the blade made contact with her skin. The pain that it caused made her forget about all of the troubles going on around her. Made her forget all about Harry, Ron and Hermione. Made her forget about the Dark Lord and Death Eaters and she liked that feeling.

Slicing further into her other wrist, her vision became out of focus and she suddenly felt weak. Her body could no longer support itself and finally made its way to the cold, tiled floor of the bathroom. Watching the blood spread out beneath her, the light was slowly disappearing and the darkness was taking over.

The feeling of tiredness over came her and her eyes forced themselves shut. The surroundings became distant and all she could hear was the slow beating of her heart.

"_Maybe I'll be happy now."_

Was the last thing she thought before succumbing to the darkness.

**....**

**.....**

**......**

**.......**

**What do you think?  
Was it good, bad or appauling?  
Please tell me by reviewing...**

**Each review means so much to me and i read each one. They always put a smile on my face!  
I need to know if i should continue writing or just give up...**

**Anyways...  
Until next time...**

**Krazykook.|  
=)**


	5. Chapter 5

**I'M A REALLY BAD PERSON!!!  
I made you all wait again, for a long, long, cliff-hanger filled, time!  
My excuse:**

**IT WAS CHRISTMAS!!**

**I hope you all had a really great time and woke up to find that Santa brought everything that you asked for!  
(I even got a little bit of snow, (From the day before) on the ground. It was my first white Christmas...Technically.**

**Anyway I hope you like the chapter...  
I did leave a bit of a cliffy didn't i?**

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN HP!!!**

**ENJOY!!!**

_Children's laughter could be heard throughout the old house. The sound was light and carefree, and subconsciously put a smile on the middle-aged woman's rosy lips. Even though it was one of those small mundane, everyday occurrences; it always made her happy, no matter how upset she had previously been._

_The back door was open and the mid-day summer heat rolled into the kitchen, hitting her with full force._

"_Where are the Children?" A caring voice asked from behind the woman. _

_Turning around, she looked into the eyes of the man who she loved most in the world. The man who took care of her no matter what the problem was. The man who she adored and would die for if needs be._

_Smiling back, she answered, "Outside." Before kissing him on the lips._

"_Ewww." A loud, high pitched whine came from the open door. Automatically recognising the familiar voice, the couple laughed against each others lips, before pulling away, to look at the small child to the side of them._

"_If you don't like it, stop looking then." The man bent down and spread his arms wide, allowing the young child to run into him for a hug._

"_Hello Daddy." The child kissed the father on the cheek, before he replied,_

"_Hello Lily. What have you been doing outside today?"_

"_Me and James and Albus were playing on the swings." She said excitedly. "I went really high, Daddy!" Her grin was as wide as her face, as she told her father proudly how high she went. Placing her carefully on the ground, lily ran straight to the backdoor. Before going into the garden, her small head, full of red hair, appeared from round the door frame,_

"_Mummy and Daddy, would you come and play with us?"_

"_Of course sweetheart, me and your mum will be out in a minute." The young girl ran of laughing to her brothers, after hearing this._

_The lady stood at the back of the kitchen, watching this scene take place in front of her eyes, her smile growing every minute that passed._

_She was happy. She had a wonderful life, with an amazing family, and most importantly she was around the people that she loved, and who loved her._

"_Aren't you coming Gin, I can hear the kids becoming impatient." Her husband, Harry asked her._

"_Yeah, I'm coming. Harry?"_

"_What is it sweetheart?"_

"_I love you."_

"_I love you to, Gin."_

* * *

Ginny took a deep breath after awakening from the surreal dream.

"_Am I dead? Because that could not have happened at any point in my life, past or future. Where am I anyway? Why can't I move, what happened?" _In the background, Ginny could hear a man speaking and decided to concentrate…Well the most that she could actually concentrate, in her condition, on what the man was saying.

"I'm sorry Mrs. Weasley, your daughter sustained substantial blood loss from the incident, possibly resulting in some sort of brain damage." A gasp could be heard from the room. "We have given her some potions to limit this damage; all we can do now is wait until she wakes up." Nodding his head, the healer then walked out of the room.

"_What?! Brain damage! What happened? I need to open my eyes and tell my mum I'm ok. I need to tell everyone that I'm ok. Merlin! What have I done now? Why can't I remember anything? This is so annoying! Arrrgh!" _Ginny mentally shouted.

There was a soft knock on the door, and Ginny imagined somebody poking their head through it.

"Mum? Is Ginny going to be ok?" A quite, deflated voice asked.

"_Ron." _Ginny recognised the voice at once._ "Ron, I'm fine, don't worry. Everything's going to be ok." _She mentally tried to reassure her brother.

"I'm sure she's going to be fine dear." Her Mother's reply was barely a whisper. She sounded tired and completely blank.

That's what scared Ginny the most, her mother's voice held no emotion at all. It was as if she lost them, when she thought she had lost her daughter.

In reality, Mrs. Weasley wasn't really there, not in soul anyway. She thought her youngest child had died, which killed her inside. Yes, she was going to survive, but how much of her mind would survive? How much of the real Ginny would wake up? Would her only daughter ever be the same again, and how much would…how much would she be affected by what she did to herself. Every time Mrs. Weasley thought about what Ginny had done, pain shot through her heart like electricity. Thinking about how much pain her daughter would have been in, caused the same bolt of electricity to strike the same spot. Everybody knew she had…problems, but she seemed to be recovering, putting it behind her and turning over a new leaf. Obviously not. If she had taken just that little bit more notice of her daughter, listened to her when she was hurting, could this have been prevented, could she have been sat at home, this very moment, laughing and talking with the people that loved her. Instead, of being in this cold hospital room, in St. Mungo's, Surrounded by nothing but white walls and worried faces.

Wiping a tear out of her eye, Mrs. Weasley kissed Ginny's head and whispered,

"We all love you Ginny, and nothing would change that. Don't you forget it."

Hoping that Ginny would hear.

**What did you think?  
Did you like, hate, love or wanted it to burn in a wheelbarrow?**

**Please tell me what you thought!!! I always love to hear from my faithful readers!!**

**Krazykook.**

**=)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Im a bad author, aren't I?  
Horrible.  
There's no excuse.**

**Anyways... Thank you for all of your reviews, i REALLY appreciate every single one of them!!**

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN HP!!!**

**Enjoy!!!**

_Harry POV_

Why?

Why did Ginny do that to herself?

Why couldn't anybody see how miserable she had been? Why couldn't _I_ see how miserable she had been? I was supposed to be one of her best friends; I was _supposed _to be her boyfriend. Everything had been perfect while we

were together, she was constantly smiling and laughing along with the rest of us.

But was she really happy? Was she secretly hurting?

How could I have not noticed it? Maybe if I saw how much she was actually hurting, I could have stopped her; stopped her from doing the unimaginable.

But did _I _cause this? Am _I _the one who did this to her?

I loved her so much, and by breaking up with her, I thought I would be protecting her from the dangers out there. The dangers that will kill her to get to me. The dangers that will show no mercy because she is just a young girl. A young girl who, at this very moment is lying in St. Mungo's fighting for her life.

When I first heard about what she had done, I had died inside. My body felt numb. I no longer cared about my own safety, or anybody else's. All that mattered was that Ginny was dying, and nothing else was important.

Why couldn't we go back to before the days of Voldemort or Horcruxes? Back to the days when everything and everyone was so carefree. Back to the days when we could actually go to Hogwarts without any fear. Back to the days when Ginny, my Ginny, didn't have any problems. If Hermione still had her old time-turner I wouldn't hesitate in stealing it, just to make sure Ginny was okay.

I have so many questions, but no answers. It is so frustrating not knowing whether she is going to make it…or not. Which brings me back to my first question; _Why?_

Obviously, I know that I caused it, but why didn't she talk to anyone? Why didn't she speak to Hermione or Mrs. Weasley about it? I can understand why she wouldn't want to talk to me, but I wouldn't have minded the awkwardness. We could've talked things through, get a few things out in the open, well…I couldn't have told her about the Horcruxes, but still.

Everybody knew she had problems, what with her anorexia, but nobody knew it was anything close to this extent. Actually wanting to die to rid the pain. Did she not see the heart break that she would cause after she was gone? Not only me, but Hermione, Mr and Mrs. Weasley, Fred and George as well as all the rest of her family and friends. She was loved so much by everyone and she didn't even know it. So now all the Weasley family, Hermione and I, were all sat round her bed, hoping for the slightest sign that she was waking up.

We didn't go in search of the Horcruxes in the end, I'm sure Dumbledore would of understood, I couldn't have left knowing the Ginny might not be there when we came back…If we came back at all.

* * *

_Ginny POV_

"_Gah_." Ginny moaned mentally.

"_How long have I been like this now? Not being able to move. I'll tell you; too long! Come on toes! You can move! Just one little wiggle and that'll do."_ Ginny tried but with no avail.

"_How long will this last for? I better not be stuck like this until the end of my life. That's ironic, only a few days ago, or maybe a week, I wished it was the end of my life. Oh, how that has changed. I miss being able to sit up, walk or talk. Or just being able to tell my mum that I'm okay and she can stop worrying, it hurts seeing…well hearing her like that. If I will myself to move that much, will it work?" _

Ginny's condition, for the next few days stayed, the same. Nobody knew when she was going to wake up, so they all tried their best to stay by her side.

"Molly? Why don't you go home and rest? You've haven't left that seat since she came in here?" Asked Remus.

"No, I'm staying here." Mrs. Weasley answered, not taking her eyes off of her daughter. Sighing, Remus walked over to Harry, Ron and Hermione and sat in the only remaining empty seat.

"We have to get Molly…" Remus was cut off by Harry gasping.

"Did you see that?"

"What Harry? See what?" Urged Hermione.

"Her toes. They moved."

**I'm sorry it's not very long...**

**Please tell me what you think! I need to know what my readers opinions are!**

**Also... If you have any ideas for the next chapter, give us a shout out in a review... I kind of have a writers block...**

**Krazykook.**

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	7. Chapter 7

**Here we are again...  
Saying goodbye for a second time!**

**Yes, you are right in thinking that this is the last chapter...  
You have all been great readers and i will miss you all!!**

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**DISCLAIMER- I DO NOT OWN HP!**

**Enjoy!**

**_Previously_**

"_No, I'm staying here." Mrs. Weasley answered, not taking her eyes off of her daughter. Sighing, Remus walked over to Harry, Ron and Hermione and sat in the only remaining empty seat._

"_We have to get Molly…" Remus was cut off by Harry gasping._

"_Did you see that?"_

"_What Harry? See what?" Urged Hermione._

"_Her toes. They moved."_

_**Harry's POV**_

Silence consumed the room for a single heart beat, the time it took for everybody to come to terms with what Harry had said. However, after that prolonged moment, many voices at once began to speak, making it nearly impossible to distinguish their owners.

"WHAT?!"

"Harry, are you sure?"

"Someone call a healer!"

"Gin, wake up. Can you hear me?"

Were among just some of the shocked replies.

Inside the room was chaotic. You could imagine _all_ of the Weasley family, plus the few extra guests, creating quite a noise and a substantial amount of movement, all in the same second. Harry was unawares that Remus and Sirius had crowded around him asking him a stream of unheard questions. He wanted to answer them, he just physically couldn't.

Why was he reacting like this? Being unable to move, think clearly or speak. He didn't react like this when facing Voldemort for the first time when he was in his first year at Hogwarts. Nor did he react like this when he duelled the same man in the cemetery when Cedric Diggory had been murdered. So what was different about his occasion?

"_Ginny…"_

But what about inside the Chamber of Secrets? Ginny was involved then, she was there and she was in danger. Why so different now?

"_You didn't love her then._"

I didn't love her then…

Harry had not realised how much Ginny had affected him these past few years. How much of an impact she had made on his life. Merlin! He stopped searching for the Horcruxes for her, because she was hurt. Because she was the world to him, and he didn't realise it until this very moment. The moment when Harry realised, Ginny was everything to him.

_**Ginny's POV**_

"_I actually did it! I moved my toe!" _Trying once again to move her toe, Ginny succeeded. "_Maybe I can open my eyes?"_

Struggling, Ginny's eye lid twitch open. A bright stream of light was the first thing Ginny saw, forcing her eyes closed, once again. But she had to do this, had to be strong enough to show her family she was okay; she had to show her family she could get through this. For the second time, her startling brown eyes fluttered open and started to take in her surroundings.

At first everything was just a blur. Like an array of bright paints splattered onto a canvas, no actual beings or objects. She liked the colours, but wanted to see her family. Her family that stood by her when she was unconscious, the ones who made sure that she was never alone either night or day, the ones who she was entirely grateful for and even though they were sometimes highly annoying and frustrating, wouldn't change them for the world.

Slowly, she was able to make out figures inside the array of colours before her. Were these figures her family and friends? Possibly. But she wasn't sure; nothing was clear enough to be completely certain yet.

"_Is Harry there? Would he be one of the people in my room? That is if anyone is in my room." _Ginny said miserably. _"Did he care about me enough to come and visit me even? Did he check up on me to see if I was still alive? Or was he still with Hermione and Ron Merlin knows where? I would imagine Hermione would visit, which would mean Ron would, because everyone knows he secretly loves her, but would Harry follow?_

"_To be honest, I'm not sure what I would want. I would love to see him when I first wake up, tell him I'm sorry for everything and it was my entire fault. But that would mean him not going where he was supposed to be going. It sounded important, and it must have been if Dumbledore had personally made sure Harry do it. I would have stopped him from completing it. It was obviously something to do with Voldemort, so if Harry actually is here it would be my fault. Like everything lese that has gone wrong in his life. I cause most of his pain, and I can't stand it."_

Ginny's vision had slowly come back to fully working order and she was frantically scanning the faces in the room.

"_Mum, Dad, Fred, George, Percy, Bill, Charlie, Sirius, Remus, Hermione, Ron and…Harry" _Her thoughts stuttered over the last name, shocked to actually see his face. "_Harry's here… He's actually here… He actually came to see me."_

Staring at his face, she noticed him coming towards her, his hand reaching out in front of his body as if to touch her. Nobody else was talking, there were just watching the two teenagers.

"Ginny." He spoke, barely a whisper.

She didn't reply, just kept staring into his bright green eyes she had always loved. Once Harry had reached her, His hand gently stroked her hair and found it was down onto her cheek.

"Harry." Ginny finally breathed out. She was still trying to come to terms with the fact that Harry had come to see her. "I'm so sorry."

A tear rolled down onto her cheek and landed on Harry's hand. He brushed it away before replying,

"Don't be." A small smile appeared on his lips and Ginny wanted nothing more to kiss him right there and then, not caring who was watching.

"I love you." She whispered, but her volume did not matter as Harry knew she meant it.

"Don't ever leave me again Ginny Weasley; I swear if you ever do that again…" But he was cut off before her could finish. As the young fiery red head used all of her energy to reach up and place a gentle kiss on his lips.

Ginny knew right there and then that she would never have to be away from Harry again.

She knew that her dream would come true.

**Did you like it?  
Did i do the last chapter justice?  
Please tell me what you thought of the story in the last review...  
and just to say good bye!**

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**Krazykook.**

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